Sep 9

Mandarin Classes

Mandarin Classes Lesson One - Earning Money.

(NOTE: this blog is continually updated. The most recent post is always below this post)

In this upper-intermediate lesson you will learn how to talk about money and dinner date plans. Keep in mind these online mandarin classes are not meant for children, as the subject matter is quite mature. Some of these sentence structures may seem complex at first. I advise that you watch this video at least 10 times.

Sometimes the subtitles go by too fast and you will not be able to keep up. I suggest you press the “pause” button (on your media player) after every line and read all four lines. And as you’re going through every line, jot down words you don’t know in a notebook. This method worked very well for me and I’ve pretty much memorized the whole movie by doing it this way.

Mandarin Classes Lesson One mp4 (right click “save as”) - formatted for iPod and PSP

Mandarin Classes Lesson One PDF (right click “save as”)

Enjoy!

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Sep 30

Mandarin Classes

Mandarin Classes Lesson Ten - Emotional Distress

In this lesson, Lin Dong finishes up some business in a hotel room. He then receives a call from Ankun demanding 20,000rmb for “emotional distress” for what Lin Dong did to Pingguo. Lin Dong plays dumb and tries to brush him off.

I could go on and on about this topic because it’s everywhere in China, but I won’t. If you have any questions, you can go to the Mandarin Classes Contact Page and send me a message.

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Ten PDF

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Ten mp4

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Sep 29

Mandarin Classes

Mandarin Classes Lesson Nine - Causing Mischief

In this Lesson, Ankun is doing a bit of payback. We see him peeping around the massage parlor and then see the result of Ankun rigging up Lin Dong’s car to a pole. This lesson is pretty short and you will probably only learn a few more Chinese swear words.

Other useful useful links to learn Chinese:

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Sep 29

Mandarin Classes

Mandarin Classes Lesson Eight - Miscommunication

In this lesson, it seems as though Ankun thinks Pingguo’s willingly had sexual relations with her boss. So he starts hitting himself. It appears as though Pingguo either failed to clearly tell Ankun what clearly happened or he simply doesn’t believe her. I personally think she didn’t tell Ankun what exactly happened because in China it seems that Chinese people leave out many key details when explaining things (Pingguo). In addition, I’ve found that Chinese people don’t like to keep asking many questions (Ankun) about a certain situation, maybe they think it’s impolite. As a result, though, the asker (Ankun) gets left in the dark and uses his/her own imagination to fill in the missing details. And the result? Lots of confusion and maybe even ending a friendship or marriage because of that.

Some more useful links about learning Chinese:

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Sep 28

Mandarin Classes

Mandarin Classes Lesson Seven - I didn’t mean to do it.

In this lesson, Pingguo’s boss ends up forcefully making whoopy with Pingguo. Ankun the window washer aka Pingguo’s hubby, ends up catching them in the act. It seems like originally Pingguo’s boss wasn’t interesting in Pingguo at all, but then saw an opportunity to do something “not intentionally”.

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Seven PDF

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Seven mp4

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Sep 24

Mandarin Classes

Mandarin Classes Lesson Six - Drunken Cursing.

In this lesson, Xiaomei gets the boot and decides to celebrate the beginning of her “mini retirement” by getting drunk with Pingguo. You’ll get a good introduction about how to curse in Chinese. 干杯!

In my personal experience, I rarely run into girls who like to drink. Maybe it’s because I live in Shanghai and usually people in the north of China drink more. On the other hand, Shanghai’s nightlife scene is one of the best in the world, and yet I always wind up meeting girls who don’t like to drink or rarely drink. It’s kind of annoying. Especially when you just want to have a couple glasses of wine and they just want to drink water.

Mandarin Classes Lesson Six PDF

Mandarin Classes Lesson Six mp4

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Sep 23

Mandarin Classes Lesson Five - The Customer’s Always Right.

In this lesson, you will learn what it’s like to be a boss in China and how to keep the customer happy. Apparently a customer got a bit “too friendly” with Xiaomei, and Xiaomei responds by grabbing a toe nail knife and almost slicing his toe off.

Not to knock the Chinese, but I’ve found that when a stranger makes them feel weird or threatened they will take the nearest weapon lying around and use it anywhere on the “victim’s” body and never think about the consequence. For example, bar fights in China don’t usually involve fists - they involve glass. Beer bottle, cocktail glass, whatever - they’ll grab it and aim for the face, or just aim randomly and throw it. In a domestic dispute, they’ll usually grab whatever is in front of them and throw that. Thankfully, I’ve never personally encountered such situations, but know way too many friends who have.

Even though I’m a big guy and there has been a few occasions where a Chinese person thought I was someone else and tried to fight me (or they were really drunk), I always backed down. One reason is that I’m scared of being glassed and another reason is that I really don’t want to be kicked out of this country.

Don’t get me wrong, though, I feel much safer here in Shanghai than pretty much any other place I’ve traveled to and also much safer that my hometown near Toronto. But the fighting here is serious business and much better to stay away.

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Five PDF

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Five mp4

If anyone has had similar experiences, feel free to leave a comment. Or even just leave a comment about this lesson.

Here are some other useful links about learning Chinese:

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Sep 22

Mandarin Classes Lesson Four - Conversations around the house.

In this lesson, Pingguo comes home and has dinner with her husband Ankun. Since they’re living in Beijing, it makes sense that they’re having something like dumplings (饺子 jiaozi) for dinner, as they are more often eaten in the north of China. They’re apartment looks really small and I bet they pay no more than 1200rmb per month as I’ve seen similar ones with prices like this.

Pingguo is concerned about how Ankun secretly watches her at work. Ankun is a window washer and washes buildings nearby and sometimes the building in which Pingguo works. Apparently if she has a husband, she can’t work anymore at Gold Basin Massage Palace.

You might notice that the dialog in the PDF is quite a bit longer than the video clip. And there’s good reason for that *wink*.

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Four mp4

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Four PDF

Here is the latest stories going around Shanghai and China:

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Sep 18

Mandarin Classes Lesson Three - Being Sneaky This mandarin class is about two sneaky girls talking about dating. As you may know, back in the day (and even now, sometimes) in China being a virgin was pretty important if you wanted a guy to date you. So becoming a virgin again surgically, ie reconstructing the hymen, wasn’t out of the ordinary. And it’s not all that expensive either - from 4,000 to around 7,000 rmb, according to a recent Chinese movie I watched.

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Three mp4

Mandarin Classes - Lesson Three PDF

More about Mandarin classes earning Chinese - the latest articles in the blogosphere:

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Sep 11

Mandarin Classes

Mandarin Classes Lesson Two - At the Massage Parlour

This mandarin lesson takes place at a massage parlour in Beijing. Lots of betting and gossip going on. I personally love getting massages here in Shanghai and enjoy playing poker too. So learning this kind of language is very useful for me and probably for you too.

Just like in this scene, it is common to see the massage parlour boss in a back room somewhere playing better games - poker or mahjong, usually - with their friends.

The massge rooms are quite private and you can get into some pretty funny conversations with your massage girl. I personally like to go with a friend and have a beer. If you want, you can tell them to go fetch beer for you from a convenience store nearby. An hour of foot massage, followed by another hour of full body massage comes to a grand total of 70rmb at the massage place where I usually go. That’s about the price of 2 drinks at a bar/club here. All the while, you can speak Chinese to the girls (because none of them can speak English). Some pretty cheap Mandarin language classes, indeed.

And if you catch the girls on a good mood, they might even invite you out after the massage for a beer chugging contest.

Mandarin Language Classes - Lesson Two mp4

Mandarin Language Classes - Lesson Two PDF

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